When You or Your Partner Are Struggling: How to Offer Support Without Becoming a Therapist

 👉 Sometimes the person you love is going through a tough time — and you don’t know what to do.

 👉 You want to help. You want to make them feel better.

👉 But you’re not a therapist — and carrying all of their struggles on your shoulders can leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated, and even resentful.

💥 Here’s how to support them with love — without losing yourself.

1. First: Why You Can’t (and Shouldn’t) Be Their Therapist

 👉 You’re their partner, friend, teammate — not their counselor. 

👉 If you try to be their "fixer":

 🚩 You’ll burn out trying to solve things you can’t control. 

🚩 They may become dependent on you — and not get real help. 

🚩 Your relationship may become all about their struggles — and stop being a real partnership.

💥 Love means supporting them — not carrying everything for them.

2. What You Can and Should Do When They’re Struggling

✅ A. Listen Without Trying to Fix

👉 Most people just want to be heard, not "fixed."

💬 “I’m here for you. Tell me what’s going on.”

💥 You don’t need to give advice — listening is powerful on its own.

✅ B. Validate Their Feelings — Even If You Don’t Fully Get It

 💬 “That sounds really hard. I’m so sorry you’re going through this.”

 💬 “I can’t imagine how tough that is — but I’m here.”

💥 Validation makes them feel seen and less alone.

✅ C. Ask How You Can Support Them (Instead of Assuming)

 💬 “Do you want me to listen, or do you want advice?” 

💬 “Is there anything specific I can do to help?”

💥 Sometimes they just want a hug. Sometimes they want to vent. Asking gives them control.

✅ D. Encourage Professional Help — Without Making Them Feel Broken

💬 “This sounds really heavy — I think a professional could help you through this. I’ll support you if you want to find someone.”

👉 Frame it as strength, not weakness to ask for help.

💥 Just like we see a doctor when we’re injured, we can see a therapist when we’re struggling mentally.

✅ E. Set Boundaries to Protect Your Own Mental Health

👉 It’s okay to say:

💬 “I love you, but I’m feeling overwhelmed too — can we figure out how to handle this together without burning out?”

💥 You can’t pour from an empty cup.

3. What to Say When You Don’t Know What to Say

 💬 “I don’t have all the answers, but I’m here to listen.” 

💬 “I hate that you’re going through this. You don’t have to do it alone.” 

💬 “You matter to me, and I want to support you — but I think a professional could help in ways I can’t.” 

💬 “We can get through this, but we may need help from someone who knows how to deal with this.”

💥 You don’t need perfect words — you just need to care.

4. What If You’re the One Struggling?

👉 If you’re always the strong one, it’s okay to say you’re not okay.

💬 “I’ve been struggling a lot lately — and I’m scared to put it all on you, but I need support.”

💥 Let them know what you need — and give them a chance to be there for you.

5. How to Keep the Relationship Healthy While Dealing With Struggles

✅ A. Make Space for Both People’s Feelings

👉 Even if one person is struggling more, both people have needs and feelings.

💬 “I know you’re going through a lot — but can we also talk about how I’ve been feeling too?”

✅ B. Set Limits on "Heavy" Conversations

👉 You don’t have to be in deep talks 24/7.

💬 “Can we talk about something fun for a bit? I need a break from the heavy stuff.”

💥 It’s okay to laugh, play, and enjoy life even during hard times.

✅ C. Ask for Outside Help (Together or Separately)

👉 Sometimes couples counseling or individual therapy is what’s needed to move forward.

💬 “Maybe it’s time we talk to someone who can help us figure this out.”

6. Final Words — You Can Support Them Without Carrying It All

 💥 Love means standing beside them, not carrying them. 

💥 You’re not supposed to be their therapist — you’re supposed to be their partner, friend, teammate. 

💥 The strongest relationships are built on care, boundaries, and real support — not trying to "save" each other.

7. Take These Reminders With You

 ❤️ “I can be supportive without being responsible for fixing everything.” 

❤️ “I can love you and still take care of myself.” 

❤️ “It’s okay to get help — from a pro, not just from me.” 

❤️ “Listening and caring is enough — I don’t need all the answers.” 

❤️ “We’re a team, but we both need to stay strong.”

8. RIZE Is Here to Help Athletes and Their Partners Support Each Other in Healthy Ways

 💬 Private coaching for athletes and partners navigating tough times together. 

💬 Workshops on healthy support, communication, and setting boundaries. 

💬 Tools to handle stress, mental health, and relationships without burning out.

💙 Because real love means standing together — not falling apart from carrying too much.